One Cigarette Lighter - Crazy Joke

The ship was sinking fast and four sailors were able to get a lifeboat into the water and climb into it safely.

They decided to have a cigarette and relax a few moments before starting their journey to safety. The cigarettes were dry, but all their matches were wet and they had no way to light their cigarettes.

Finally, one of the sailors came up with a solution. He threw a cigarette overboard.

This worked well. They were able to smoke, because ...

... the lifeboat had become ONE CIGARETTE LIGHTER

Joke - At The Funeral Ceremony

A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service, the pallbearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket.

They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive!

She lives for 10 more years and then dies. A ceremony is again held and, at the end of the service, the pallbearers are once more carrying the casket.

As they are walking out, the husband shouts,

"Watch out for the wall!"

The Princess and the Bee| Bee Venom Face Mask

I bet you are all wondering how the lovely Kate Middleton looks so great and what her facial routine is and how she is so wrinkle free! Or like me, you really haven't given a second thought about it. But anyways here is how she supposedly keeps her face line free, and it's a trick given to her by Duchess Camilla.

The big secret is a natural alternative to Botox, in the shape of a Bee Venom Mask. It is a product supplied by Heaven Skin Care by Deborah Mitchel. The science behind the product is that the cream contains one per cent bee venom. This venom tricks the skin's surface into thinking it had been stung, thus increasing the blood flow, collagen and elasticity. The Princess herself has private treatments at her home, as opposed to buying the product.

In my opinion I can see the sense in this, I understand how it works, and think it's a pretty innovative product. I would love to try it myself, but as I currently don't have many lines on my face I'm reluctant to folk out the £65 needed per pot.

If anyone has tried this product I would love to hear about it, and see what your experiences have been like.

Abs Are Made In The Kitchen

I don't know about you, but I never seem to get the right balance with nutrition and exercise. I either find myself religiously working out, 5/6 days a week, feeling great, but not eating right as I am in the mentality that "oh I worked out already, so I can eat this chocolate." Or I eat great, really healthily, but don't exercise, as I think "I'm eating great and loosing weight, so I don't need to exercise."

At the moment I am eating great, but not exercising, I keep telling myself "Oh well, weight loss is 70 percent diet, and 30 per cent exercise." However if I don't work out I won't be toned, I need to kick myself up the bum. Think of it this way, you eat 3-5 times a day, everyday, however you only workout 1-2 times a day 5-6 times a week. The activity that you partake in the most, if obviously going to have a greater impact on your body. 

So starting this week, as in tomorrow! I am going to workout 4 days a week, and keep my soup/smoothie diet up.

I am also upping my soup/smoothie diet, to kick start my weight loss for December. So I will be having 3 smoothies a day, and 3 soups a day, it will almost be like a cleanse. Everything I eat will be green and I will be making sure the soups and smoothies are rammed full of protein so I do not loose muscle mass like you can do in some cleanses. 

Have you ever been on a cleanse, or liquid diet? Do you get the balance right between exercise and diet?

Harper Beckham| Four Months and Fabulous

This is just a quick little post about how fabulous I think Harper Beckham is, but more importantly how fabulous Victoria Beckham is.

Victoria Beckham has always been a huge favorite of mine. I was never one of her many haters she seems to have her in the UK, and have always been a big defender of hers. I completely love how she has now proved her haters wrong and become a worldwide successful fashion designer. Like she says in her own words "Our turnover year-over-year has increase over 120 percent. I think to anyone's standards that's pretty impressive."

She is often given a hard time in the press here, about how she always carries Harper around like she's an accessory, yes she would be safer in a pram, but she is not the first celebrity to show off their child. Plus at least she is spending time with her child, and does not leave her with a nanny at all times while she flies around the world.

Today Victoria is getting a hard time for spending £30 on a pair of Chloe tights for Harper, but come on, the Beckham's are worth millions, so why can they not spend their money on their children. Plus it is all about relevance. To many spending £30 on a pair on tights for a baby is absurd, as that could be the cost of a meal out at a restaurant, or near the cost of a weekly shop for one. But to the Beckhams, who's income is higher, so their spending will be higher, £30 for tights would have the same significance as one of us mere mortals spending £5 on tights.

What is your opinion on the Beckhams, do you love them or loathe them?