Joke - Bringing Her Back

A man was talking to his friend about what to do for his 50th wedding anniversary. The friend asked, "What did you do for your 25th?"

He said, "I took my wife to Hawaii."

The friend then asked, "What are you thinking about for your 50th?" 

He said, "Well I was thinking of bringing her back".

VIMWANA

Joke - Going To Heaven

I was testing the children in my sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. I asked them, 'If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven?'

'NO!' the children answered.

'If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?'

Again, the answer was, 'NO!'

By now I was starting to smile. Hey, this was fun!

'Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved all beings, would that get me into Heaven?' I asked them again. 

Again, they all answered, 'NO!'

'Well,' I continued, 'how can I get into Heaven then?'

A five-year-old boy shouted out,

'YOU GOTTA BE DEAD.'

Joke - The Mystery Of 11AM Deaths

This happened in a hospital's Intensive care unit where patients started dying every Sunday morning - exactly at 11 AM, regardless of their medical condition.

This puzzled the doctors and an expert team was thus constituted to investigate into the causes of the incident. The following Sunday morning, minutes before 11 AM, the expert team anxiously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about..


Just when the clock struck 11...


and then......

Santa Singh, the Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and Unplugged the life support system and plugged in the vacuum cleaner.

Joke - Green Bananas

A 96 year old business tycoon was approached by an investment consultant.


"Sir, I have this wonderful investment opportunity for you that will double your money in 5 years", said the consultant.


"5 Years! Are you crazy?" remarked the tycoon, "At my age I do not even buy Green Bananas!"