Joke - Things My Mother Taught Me

MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME


1. LOGIC..."If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go to the store with me." 


2. TO THINK AHEAD..."If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job!" 


3. TO MEET A CHALLENGE..."What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you...Don't talk back to me!"


4. HUMOR..."When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me." 


5. HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT..."If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up. 


6. GENETICS..."You are just like your father!" 


7. ABOUT MY ROOTS..."Do you think you were born in a barn?" 


8. ABOUT THE WISDOM of AGE..."When you get to be my age, you will understand." 


9. ANTICIPATION..."Just wait until your father gets home." 


10. RECEIVING..."You are going to get it when we get home." 


And, my all-time favorite - JUSTICE..."One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like YOU -- then you'll see what it's like!"