• My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned...couldn't concentrate.
• Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
• Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting.
• Then I tried to be a chef -- figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme *.
• My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
• I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
• Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.
• I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
• I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
• So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
• After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.
• My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.
* Thyme is a well-known culinary and medicinal herb.
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